Archive for Books for Businesswomen
Women Leadership and Mad Men
Posted by: | Comments
Some revolutions are bloody, and some are flash-in-the-pan moments.
The women’s movement began quietly with a book “The Feminine Mystique”, moved to bra burning, and gained traction with consciousness raising groups.
All of that seems like it was centuries ago.
We now head large organizations, are in key positions in government, and have a say in just about everything. Yet some of the pleaser and martyr behavior patterns that were handed from generation to generation are still dying a slow death.
Just watch “Mad Men” and remember how it was. You worked if you typed and delivered. No not ideas – merely the coffee to the men. While much has changed, there is more work to be done.
This is a year of both celebrating change and dialoguing about what still needs to change. CELEBRATION: in the next few months women will cross the threshold and become the majority workers in America. CELEBRATION: women professionals are in the majority in this country. CELEBRATION: women have become economically powerful in their own right.
What is the next phase of the revolution toward equality, and even beyond that, toward partnership?
Perhaps we need to regroup and create consciousness-raising groups that mirror the 60’s. Maybe this time it needs to include both men and women. While we need to celebrate the successes, we really need to ask the hard questions that remain unanswered for ourselves, our children, and even our grandchildren.
My daughters are grown, and I am now watching the dilemmas and concerns about what it means to raise children in a world that is going at warp-speed. What does it mean to run a business, run a household, and still have time for the kids?
I believe the dialogues of today are around the unfinished business of the past. The issues are around motherhood, and fatherhood. The issues at the deepest level are about the children. If we have them, then who raises them? What kind of support is needed to bring out the best in the next generation?
This is where the pleaser and martyr patterns of the past, so deep in the neuropsychology of most women, kick in. Women still appear to be the ones who make the plans for the youngsters, take off the time if they are sick, and worry about grades, friends and drugs. Sure, dads are included, yet it still seems that mothers are carrying the heaviest part of the load. That has not really changed.
I am not suggesting we demand that our men vacuum and make the oatmeal. That discussion belongs to each couple to sort out. I am thinking way bigger than that. I am wondering if we can look at the countries that have offered families more help, looking especially at Norway and Sweden.
What do we need to do to change, so the next generations grow to be the best they can be? When do we as women take the pleaser and martyr parts of our personalities and transform them into their positive opposites – the truth teller and the integrator? What are the questions that need to be asked to sort out the dilemma of what we can do, what our businesses can do, and what government can do?
I’d love to hear from you with ideas about creating life-enhancing programs that can deter so many of the social problems connected with the new world of work we have helped create, and the burdens of parenting at every level of our society.
Let’s start a 21st Century rendition of consciousness-raising, and keep the revolution for healthy and balanced evolution at the forefront of our lives.
Leadership and “Process till you Puke”!
Posted by: | Comments
In every business, in every life, it is vital to process all information and even emotional content to make sure that you are making the best decisions you can make. Yet, there are extremes and when you get caught at one end point of the spectrum or the other, there is a tendency to either deny what is going on, or indulge in over-thinking the process.
One of our best consultants at Creative Energy Options, Inc. (CEO), Dianne Moore, who covers the Midwest for us, had an amazing “aha” moment about too much process time and what it does to us. An eloquent writer, she talks for so many of us, especially women who do tend to be the queens of analyzing and looking over and over again at what life holds, both at home and in the business world.
I’d love your comments on what you do when you get stuck in a place where you begin to over think what you are doing.
“The Pity Pot”
Let’s hear it for process! Yes, let’s give it some well-deserved, rousing applause….clap……..clap………..clap……..clap.
I am sick of process.
Process grinds you down, beats you up, gives you the run around, wrings you out, slaps you sideways, and pulls you under.
Process halts life, sidetracks dreams, curbs joy, and blocks creativity.
Process addles the brain, amplifies pain, and arrests gain.
Process destroys, dumbfounds, and demolishes. Process disconnects, disturbs, discourages and disengages.
Plain and simple….PROCESS SUCKS.
I am sick of the journey. I am fed-up with faith, have had it with hope and checked out of charity ten days ago. I feel like molasses and look like shit. I am bored with my whining, irritated by everyone, and sick to death of living in brain fog.
I am plagued by idiots, pained by idealists and just plain out of idioms (thank goodness).
I want a process-free life. Where is the potion, the pill, the process to be process-free? (Now that is just plain silly.)
It is time to give this pity pot A ROYAL FLUSH!
Create Your Own Prosperity
Posted by: | CommentsGuest post by Allison Maslan (learn more about Allison at the end of this post)
Money alone will not make you happy. It’s what the money can do for you that can bring joy. It can give you leverage to capture a life-long dream. It can go to a family in need. It has given me the ability to buy this computer, my writing tool in sharing my coaching, teaching concepts and to write my book, Blast Off! Money is often given a negative connotation. You’ve heard the idea that having wealth will make you greedy or give you an attitude of being “better than.” How can this be true? Money is actually an avenue for freedom of choice. Just as a state of balanced health gives us freedom to move and be in the world, money gives us the freedom to do, or not to do, what we choose. When money is limited, your choices are limited. If you’re struggling to come up with cash, your choices of housing and food decrease. The more money you have access to, the less you worry about survival, which frees up your mind from unwanted thoughts. Therefore, money is an avenue of liberty because it gives you independence to express your creative and individual voice.
What you want to spend your money on may not be what I want to spend my money on. Money is used to express your desires, whether you save it, invest it, or spend it. You may enjoy spending your cash on mystery novels and I enjoy spending mine on a vacation to Mexico. You may donate funds to the homeless and I choose to support a literacy campaign. Money gives us the freedom to express our passions. If you have money, you have more choices.
Do you struggle with issues of fear around money? Have you ever thought that the fear and the action of holding onto your money or your safe job could actually be the very things that may be causing you to struggle in survival mode? This fear of losing or not making money will actually hold you back from creating more money. Read More→
Leadership Partnership and Business Possibilities
Posted by: | CommentsClearing out the old to make way for the new is a wonderful practice as we enter a new year. This time, as we graduate into a new decade, the teen years of the century, we have an amazing opportunity to find a better balance and create a different kind of partnership between men and women.
I believe that female leaders in the work world can lead the way in positive and exciting ways. It struck me, and with pride, I acknowledged our successes to date. While we have a rocky road ahead, any transformation worth its weight means twists and turns and boulders to be confronted. Yet, if we stay centered with our eyes on the goal of male/female partnership, we can and will change the world for the better.
Here is what happened as I dove into some dusty, old boxes. I found a journal, like really old. One my daughter wrote as a teenager. I did call and ask permission to read before I sent it to her in San Francisco. I remember learning my lesson about snooping a long time ago!
She is now married with two children. After balancing work and kids, she made the decision to close her business and be a stay-at-home mom till they were “launched”. That meant two years at home and I believe it was in part a reaction to the fact that I never stopped my career when she and her sister were little.
She is now ready to re-enter the work force and is keeping all options open. That means changes on the home front. I have watched as she and her husband have negotiated the unavoidable – the car pools, doctor’s visits, and yes, even folding the laundry. It will get more intense, and so what!
Now back to her journal. What struck me was the tone of her teen writing. I was surprised that there was so much of the old model from my own adolescence. There was still a quality of letting the male take the lead, of waiting for the phone to ring, of obsessing over the extra few pounds.
That was twenty plus years ago. I asked her what has changed. She seems much more willing to say her piece, to stand her ground. Here is what she said, “The great things you and your female colleagues did to stand up against “second class citizenship” for women both at home and at work really did rub off. I don’t worry about my daughter growing up with limited choices. I do also want her to see parents who talk about what is fair. That is what was missing from your generation”.
I agree. We are entering a time when one key is adaptation. New models of what it means to be a female and what it means to be a male are emerging. How are we going to create the dialogues that will lead to integrated ways of working and playing together? Can football and beer survive? Can frilly clothing and spa days survive?
The other side of adaptation is resistance. How many Dr. Laura’s will be needed to beat down the intended changes? How must the media rethink its role in selling the old stereotypes? We need some educated discussions about “Mad Men” and what we can learn from those days. What my daughter said is what the world needs now, enhanced discussions about fairness and partnership as we all walk the rocky, winding road of this teen decade.
Journaling Your Way to the Top
Posted by: | CommentsGuest post by Selena Rezvani (learn more about Selena at the end of this post)
Increasingly, journaling is a core component of leadership classes and related training programs. Why? Journaling is an effective technique for reflecting on one’s strengths or areas of weakness, or in response to a significant incident that shaped you in some way. Journaling is a process of self-development that aids progress and is helpful when used alone, in a group setting, or with a trusted advisor. Many women executives I interviewed suggested keeping logs or diaries of career successes and lessons learned to reflect upon. The concept of a professional diary fosters accountability and progress, and represents an organizational system for documenting your talents. Alexandra Miller, Chief Executive Officer of Mercedes Medical, Inc., encourages young women to use concrete strategies that encourage goal setting. She advised, “Focus like a laser beam on what you want. Set goals, and timelines on how you’ll achieve them.”
Documentation has a practical use as well; it becomes handy in hiring, promotion, and compensation conversations. Whereas many of us are used to engaging in verbal dialogue about our careers, journaling converts it to a tangible medium, thereby increasing our chances of accountability and effectiveness in meeting goals. Your journal can also be a reference that you consult to help substantiate how you have improved in an area.
Journals can be used in many forms; below I have listed some of the methods with which creative journaling can be most useful: Read More→
