Kindness brings money to us. Joy brings money to us. Love brings money to us.
This is the truth, and it’s a shame that we aren’t told this from childhood. What we’re taught instead is to be humble and to fit in, so we won’t be singled out and forfeit our “piece of the pie.”
But the irony is that we must also fight tooth and nail to preserve and defend our share against those who would steal it. So we compete in a quiet, lonely fashion, wearing a mask that says, “I’ve got this,” when really we’re just desperate and hungry.
We clamor to be the best. And we stop at nothing to protect our piece of the pie. The result is that we are a society of angry, shamed, depressed people.
It makes sense. If we constantly feel that we aren’t measuring up and that we are always one misstep away from losing our piece of the pie, it absolutely makes sense that we end up insecure and upset.
But what if there were more than one pie? Moreover, what if we could bake our own? And what if we shared?
Money (the pie) tends to get painted as the root of all evil. What gets overlooked is that the purpose of money is to share and circulate the infinite wealth available to us. Kindness, joy, and love are also about sharing and circulation. This is no coincidence. The kinder, the more joyful, and the more loving we are – in the most profound way – the more money that will come to us.
Good is always rewarded with abundance. It may not be a direct consequence and it may not be in cash (like a gift or a surprise freebie), but being kind gives back to us by always, always bringing some kind of abundance!
For example, at his commencement speech at Harvard, Mark Zuckerberg shared a story about running late for his first lecture and in his haste, unknowingly putting his t-shirt on inside out and backwards. No one talked to him except Kang-Xing (KX) Jin, who befriended him and now plays a major role in running Facebook. KX was kind and loving. The indirect result was a very lucrative opportunity. I remind myself of this example often.
These days, I’m a far cry from the detached and clamoring woman I used to be. The old me used to vie for the same pie as everyone else. I expended all my efforts on “measuring up” to guarantee me my share, running myself ragged as I pushed toward a future overflowing with material gain.
- I didn’t make the time to learn the crafts and skills I wanted to learn.
- I didn’t make the time to read the books I wanted to read.
- I didn’t make the time to stop and reflect on why I was doing certain things.
- I didn’t make the time to get in touch with the sensual feminine side of me.
I was losing out on – and dishonoring – the wonderful person I was. So I shifted my mindset for my own good. And when I started to focus on the kindness, joy, and love I could bring to the world, I realized that these were the three ingredients to bake a pie! I didn’t have to fight over my “piece” when I could make my own… and have it all!
I began lavishing kindness and love on myself, and I now embody some impressive results:
- I feel more free yet more responsible. I always get what I want with the money I have, but gone are those impulses to shop ’til I drop. Bye-bye, buyer’s remorse!
- I feel more expansive yet more contained. I’m able to afford more luxurious treats for myself. But it’s all for me and me alone – I no longer feel the need to achieve something for others to see.
- I feel more authentic yet more focused. I don’t feel that old familiar pressure to be someone else, or to squish into an acceptable mold. I’m determined to impact the world — my way.
Here’s how you can start your own journey to “HarMoney” (a harmonious relationship with Money):
- Begin the day with some self-kindness, whether that’s allowing a little quiet time with a cup of tea or just an extra dose of patience in the midst of a busy morning.
- Look at your life and ask yourself how you can best bring kindness, joy, and love to the world.
- Imagine a scene – in detail – in which you are sharing those qualities with others.
- Feel the smile on your face and the warmth in your heart.
- Then simply ask yourself, “What can I do today to be that version of me?” and start there.
Money is not a single pie that we’re all fighting over. You don’t have to hide a desperate and hungry face with a humble mask. You don’t have to wave your knife across the table and count every crumb.
Your life is your kitchen. You’ve got the recipe. And there is plenty of kindness, joy, and love in the cupboards.
About the Author
Maria Kathlyn Tan or “Miracle Maria” serves multi-passionate, soul-centered individuals in channeling their inner magic as they connect to their desires and create momentum in their businesses and lives.