When you’re a hardworking business owner, it’s easy to spend so much time on work that you’re unaware of the root causes of why your personal life may be falling flat. We all want to experience personal fulfillment on a regular basis, but there are ways that we unconsciously sabotage ourselves.
Here are five common habits that undercut our efforts to attain fulfillment:
1. Chasing People Who Don’t See Your Value
We’ve all sent an extra text to someone who ignored the first one, invited someone to an event when we knew the whole time that they would cancel, and given our all to a conversation only to be met with one word replies. This leads you to feel embarrassed and mad at yourself for trying so hard to win people over who clearly couldn’t care less about you.
Take your power back and stop begging people for approval and attention who have a history of rejecting and devaluing you.
2. Putting Others’ Wants Above Your Needs
If you have kids, you may love them, but do you really need to go out with pneumonia during a rainstorm to find them the newest Ben & Jerry’s ice cream flavor? Letting people’s wants eclipse your needs is a recipe for physical and emotional breakdowns and eventual resentment.
Sacrificing for others is honorable, but don’t risk needing to be sent to the emergency room over trivial requests that can wait until you are physically, mentally, and emotionally well enough to deliver on them.
3. Devoting Large Chunks of Time to Meaningless Activities
There are so many meaningful aspects of life like cultivating friendships, spending time with your family, and devoting time to your favorite hobbies. Those things certainly should not take a backseat to you arguing over politics in the YouTube comment section for hours each day.
When you start overdosing on petty activities, ask yourself, “If I only had 24 more hours to live, would I want to keep doing this?” We all have little vices that we engage in when we’re bored, but when they are eclipsing the things in life that truly matter, it’s time to drastically cut down the time you spend engaging in those activities.
4. Never Viewing the Present Moment as Good Enough
On New Year’s Eve you’re wishing that it was Valentine’s Day. On Valentine’s Day, you’re wishing that it was Halloween. At some point, the present moment has to meet your standards if you want to be happy.
Instead of jumping from moment to moment without appreciating or savoring the things that you are experiencing, allow the present moment to be good enough for you because someday you will no longer have a lifetime supply of experiences to waste.
5. Competing Against Others
How much has making sure you have the nicest car or always have the most expensive clothes out of your friends really contributed to your overall sense of fulfillment? The thing about competition is that it is only fun when you are the one on top. At some point you are going to be the underdog, and if you are constantly looking over your shoulder to see who is doing better than you, you are signing up for undue misery.
There will always be someone who looks better, has more money, and who is excellent at something you are barely proficient at. The only person who you can consistently outperform in every area is yourself.
About the Author
Marissa Russell is a Certified Life Coach who specializes in helping high-achieving career women find fulfillment beyond their professional lives. Her services can be found at www.thehighachievingwoman.com.