What is it about us, women, who feel like we can’t ask for what we want?
Why do we find it so difficult to be upfront about something we disagree with?
Women are agreeable.
What Does Agreeableness Mean?
Agreeableness is a term in psychology that describes someone as considerate, cooperative, and harmonious.
If you are agreeable, you most likely focus on interpersonal relationships and want everyone to get along.
Being agreeable is nothing to be ashamed of. It helps you build your professional network and personal relationships with ease. With that said, agreeableness can come back to bite us if we’re not careful.
Why is Agreeableness Tough in the Workplace?
Agreeable traits make kind and dutiful workers, but they do not help us in situations that involve the word, money.
Let’s face it, the workplace is an environment focused on making the most money. You want to earn what you put in, or more.
Women tend to be more agreeable than men. While both men and women can be hard workers, most women don’t ask for something that we want in the workplace because it may create conflict.
We don’t want to push ourselves to the top in fear of pushing someone else down, so we end up at the bottom ourselves.
So, How Can You Become Less Agreeable?
Becoming less agreeable doesn’t mean you need to act rude and without compassion. Becoming less agreeable means becoming more assertive.
It’s owning up to yourself and telling your boss what you want and why you deserve it. It’s being rightfully recognized for the hard work that you put in. It’s learning how to say no.
What Steps Can You Take to Becoming Less Agreeable?
1. Be Direct
It’s easy to dumb down the way you talk by using phrases such as: kind of, sort of, and maybe.
Instead of saying, “I was sort of hoping to get next Thursday off so I can attend my daughter’s recital,” say, “I would like to have next Thursday off because my daughter is performing in a recital.”
Be confident in how you speak.
2. State the Facts
If and when you plan on asking for something at work, make sure to have facts ready to justify your request.
For example, if you want to pitch an idea to a professional, create a list of reasons why X will benefit them. This will make your pitch credible without the need to be extremely stern.
3. Use Your Agreeableness as an Advantage
If you are agreeable, then you most likely have the talent of being able to talk to just about anyone. You understand social cues and how people work. You know how to approach people and can tell when your boss is in a bad mood.
Allow your intuition to tell you when it’s the right time to ask for something and when you should take a step back. Tune into others’ needs without being a pushover.
Agreeableness is a beneficial trait to have when it comes to creating relationships in all aspects of your life, but it can be a disadvantage if you allow it to be. It’s time to earn what you work hard for by becoming less agreeable and more assertive.
Dig your heels in the ground and get what you deserve.
Do you have any more tips on being assertive? Share with us below.
About the Author
Jessica Pereira is a digital marketing freelance writer for hire who offers B2B writing, ghostwriting, and blogging services. She uses her insight to inspire readers to take the leap within their business.